(Barr is in his office at the DOJ when he hears a voice that sounds like thunder calling his name. Unlike his boss, he knows who it is. He kneels, lowers his eyes, and responds.)
B: I am here, my Lord! I am your instrument! Use me as you see fit!
G: Do you know why I am speaking to you, Bill Barr?
B: I would never presume to know your will, my Lord.
G: I am angry, Bill Barr. Do you know why?
B: Why?
G: Once again, my chosen people have foresaken me. Sodomites are everywhere–they even have the right to marry! The culture is full of trash and pornography! Abortion is actually legal! Crime! Drugs! The whole place has gone to hell! So to speak, of course.
B: I know, my Lord. I complain about it every day, but no one listens.
G: Even your boss, who is also my instrument, frequently takes my name in vain.
B: I’ve tried to stop him, but you know how he is.
G: I understand. He’s a busy man. He doesn’t have time for that political correctness crap.
B: What do you ask of me, my Lord?
G: As you know, I have brought a great plague on your country as punishment for its sins.
B: I figured as much.
G: It’s an opportunity, and a warning. I can do much worse. Whether I do or not is up to you.
B: How, my Lord?
G: Ask for emergency powers and use them to clean up the country. Get rid of the secular humanists and the sodomites and the pornographers. Put my name in every school in the country. It’s your big chance. Use it!
B: But the law and the Constitution!
G: What’s more important, me or them? I don’t care a fig for your Constitution. Do what’s right! Follow the example of my beloved Thomas More–only win this time!
B: Yes, my Lord! I will do it, starting today!
(Barr then wakes up and realizes he is in his bed, it was just a dream, Donald Trump is still his boss, and he had too many martinis last night.)