(In order to prove his point, Donald Trump shot a man on Fifth Avenue in broad daylight. The House has impeached him. The trial begins.)
CHIEF JUSTICE: How do you plead?
TRUMP: I am above the law. Impeachment is unconstitutional. I can only be removed from office by the vote of a majority of the true (meaning, white) citizens of America. That, of course, will never happen.
GOP SENATORS: We can’t go that far, but we say there is no evidence that Trump shot anyone.
DEMOCRATS: We have a hundred witnesses who saw him do it.
GOP SENATORS: Yeah, but they’re all Democrats. This is a purely partisan witch hunt.
DEMOCRATS: Half of them were Republicans.
GOP SENATORS: OK, so he did it, but it was fully justified. It was self-defense. The guy was a progressive. He could have been trying to shoot our beloved president.
DEMOCRATS: All of the witnesses will testify that the man was unarmed, and presented no threat to Trump.
GOP SENATORS: OK, so he did it, and it was unjustified, but the guy didn’t die. Trump doesn’t shoot well enough to kill him. That isn’t bad enough to justify removing him from office and undoing the results of the last election.
(They vote, and Trump is acquitted on those grounds, although he is fuming that the GOP senators didn’t accept his defense, and he is plotting his revenge.)