Monster Hurricane Ron hit Florida this morning. With almost surgical precision, it devastated Broward County, a Democratic stronghold, and then veered back out to sea. Hundreds of thousands of blue voters were killed, and millions were left without power. The red voters of Palm Beach, including Trump, were spared.
Safe in his Tallahassee mansion, Governor DeSantis was exultant. “That’s what those people get for hating God and me,” he said. “Now they’re getting their reward for being pervert groomers. They’re burning in Hell, and I’m going to be re-elected. Dead men can’t vote.”
“Who said that climate change is a bad thing? It’s even more effective than the pandemic in getting rid of liberals. Now we can get on with the job of making Florida a paradise for real Americans, and really stick it to any liberals who are left.”