Chuck Schumer has come to the Oval Office for a victory lap.
B: Chuckles! You da man! Or should I say, you da Manchin whisperer!
S: I just did my job, Mr. President.
B: I remember in the old days, Barack used to call me the McConnell whisperer. I guess something like that is your job now.
S: Something like that. Joe’s easier to deal with than Mitch, even though he’s less predictable.
B: We’ve accomplished quite a lot in this term, don’t you think?
S: We didn’t make you the new FDR. That was probably never realistic, given our slim majorities, the Ukraine war, and inflation. But leaving that aside, I think our record is damn good. Particularly if you compare it to Trump’s. All he could do is cut taxes, and he barely got that done.
B: So where do we go now?
S: First, we need to start selling all these bills to the American public and pointing out the differences between us and the Republicans. Then, we have to do a decent job with the election.
B: Then what? Do we have a realistic agenda for the next two years?
S: Almost regardless of the outcome of the election, we’re playing defense the next two years. Barring some sort of a miracle, we’re not getting anything meaningful done until 2024.
B: Yeah, the next two years are going to be full of Republican malarkey. They’re going to be investigating my son out the wazoo. We’re probably going to have a debt ceiling crisis, too. The Trump base will demand one. They don’t care if we destroy the country’s credit or not. That’s part of burning it down.
S: What will you do if it happens?
B: I’m not going to give in to GOP blackmail, no matter what. We will continue to pay the nation’s bills whether Kevin and Mitch agree to it or not.
S: Good. In the meantime, let’s enjoy what we’ve accomplished. It was a long and winding road to get here.
B: And you were the driver. Thanks for everything. (Schumer leaves)