(Joe Biden is in his basement, still mulling over his VP choice, when God calls his name. Unlike Trump, he knows who it is immediately.)
B: Yes, Lord. What can I do to best serve you?
G: Well, you could stop hating me, and being against me, for one.
B: I hope you’re not buying into those lies that Trump tells. I’ve always been here for you, just as you were here for me.
G: I’m just pulling your chain. Trump has you confused with that guy from the XFL. I don’t believe a word he says.
B: So, am I going to win the election?
G: I know, but cannot say. Kind of like your VP choice.
B: Who knew God was a comedian?
G: George Burns, for one. Here’s one for you: two angels and a demon walk into a bar together . . .
B: Enough divine comedy! Let’s be serious. You’re not going to help Trump, are you?
G: I stay out of elections. As I told him, if America is stupid enough to vote for him, they deserve him. I’ll be happy if you win, though. I’m tired of the lies and the stupid drama.
B: Is there anything I can do for you?
G: Yes. You can try to heal all of the divisions in your country. I hate that. Something needs to be done.
B: Job 1, boss.
(God leaves. Biden still hasn’t picked his running mate.)